I often feel that life is terribly ruthless as it rushes onward and demands that I rush along with it. It takes me along paths with obstacles and pitfalls where I will be sure to fall and scrape a knee and on occasion brake a bone. As I am feeling sorry for myself, life is impatient and tells me to hurry up. There are things to do, places to go, people to attend to, goals to reach, plans to make and on and on. But it hurts! Can't I get a bandaid? Can I wash off the dirt at least?
In the last weeks I have felt a torrent of emotions, decisions, worries, excitements, stress, and all sorts of everything we children of God experience all mounting and building until at a climax I found myself unable to hold back tears and depression and sadness threatened to overwhelm and leave me incapable following life along his reckless marathon. Somewhere inside there was a peace and stillness. A feeling of rightness about it all but my desire to sleep or read a book and ignore the rest of the world was far more appealing than accepting help from the spirit.
This morning I attended a private yoga session. As I meditated and allowed my body, my spirit, and my mind to be at peace with one another, I felt beauty in life once again. He and I are friends, I do believe, but I forgot that for a while. I am still sad. But I can live at peace with being sad while simultaneously appreciating love, beauty, peace, and simple joys in life. Though tears may come, there is hope smiling brightly before me. As I drove away, I felt like singing. That is a good feeling.
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